Because whether he knows it or not, Norman Dreger’s quick-thinking is a brief clinic in how to take a crazy moment and nurture it into genuine sharable gold, with the most important lesson being: “Keep yourself together, man”

Sure. Without a doubt, the arrival of a bald eagle to poach your catch is enough to merit a stream of colourful language that stands in stark contrast to the feathers of your assailant. But what about the children? They want to enjoy the adventures of opportunistic birds as much as anybody, but their stupid square parents won’t let them watch if the witnesses happen to have trucker mouths.

So what to do if you’re used to working blue? Just follow Norman’s lead. Pretend you’re howling your way down the first drop of a roller coaster with a young relative at your side and you’re well on your way to G-rated internet success.

Just look at Boyd Crowder here, wobbling around the television like a cat that’s fresh from an office chair spin cycle. There’s no amount of blink-to-take-a-picture gimmickry that could make me as excited about Google’s foray into high-end face fashion as I would be to have one of these in my home.

Of course, if an afternoon spent at an amusement park seems a little too wholesome for you, there are available options that are a little more…medieval.

Disunion – The guillotine simulator from André Berlemont on Vimeo.

(Video via Ibarakiprefecture)

So let’s have a little perspective after a long winter. The sun is out, after-work pints are hours away, squirrels are getting fat again and oh my god there’s a cat hallway swimming on a balcony.

Things aren’t so bad.

(Video via Jamuomii)

But all things must pass, and some feel-good party pooper has proven that again by unearthing an assortment of civic-minded everyday heroes undaunted by a daily gauntlet of fistfights, wayward military hardware and cow-spilling truck mishaps.

So let’s enjoy one last look at this instant classic before soaking it in sepia and storing it in the vault forever. Fun’s over.

(Video via SimplyGuys)

Rest assured that stardom awaits.

And there’s a whole lot more where that came from.

(Via Reddit)

Perhaps a key to that riddle can be found in this footage of a pilot landing a helicopter on a highway guardrail so a similarly dextrous doctor can hop out and tend to the injured at the scene of a car crash.

Naturally, the whole thing takes place against a beautiful backdrop. Which may also help explain why Norwegians also have a reckless disregard for our own beautiful backdrops.

(Video via Avisa Sør-Trøndelag)

Here’s the sound as hear from the outside world, where funnily enough, winter never comes.

Also: Comments aren’t moderated, so watch out….

(Videos via Elegrabe and FlavourWave)

It would also be nice if it turned folks I disappointed into unresponsive sprites, but I like to consider myself a realist.

(Video via Moving Mind Studio)

Either you can rest on laurels earned from years of sparse soap scoring, or you can make make yourself more valuable by loading up on some new skills. You, know…adapt.

Or adopt.

(Thanks Reddit)

But maybe we’re doing this all wrong. Maybe we should be saluting these friends on the other side of the world who are shedding the totalitarian yoke and democratizing extreme sports.

Those Russians aren’t crazy. Those Russians are heroes.*

* Correction: They’re crazy. Don’t do this.