Remember that “exclusive” interview Lindsay Lohan was going to do on “Ellen” – the only media appearance she agreed to do to promote her new Playboy magazine spread? Well, she missed it. Of course she did! Why am I wasting your time with this news? (Honestly, because nothing else is really happening. Sorry.)

Anyway, her rep says the reason she didn’t make the show was because she “was delayed in Hawaii due to a travel-related issue. Lindsay offered to tape ‘Ellen’ tomorrow, but the show was unable to shift things around and tomorrow is their last day of taping for the season.” The show’s producers are less than pleased, according to Gossip Cop. “Not a call or an apology from Lindsay,” a source close to the show says.

However, the producers scored a coup de grace and got Paris Jackson (Michael Jackson’s oldest child) to fill in for Lohan. It’s Jackson’s first solo television appearance, and it will air today. The 13-year-old talked about her role in the  fantasy film “Lundon’s Bridge and the Three Keys.” She says her decision to act was due to her father. “My dad was in the movie ‘Moonwalker’ and I knew he could sing really well, but I didn’t know he could act. I saw that and I said, ‘Wow, I want to be just like him,’” she revealed.

She did admit that she was less than thrilled with his choice to put them in masks as kids.  “I’m like, ‘This is stupid. Why am I wearing a mask?’” Paris said. “But I kind of realized the older I got, like, he only tried to protect us.”

Kutcher’s fling admits she was wrong

Well, this is a first: A fame tart is actually admitting to doing (gasp!) the wrong thing. Despite the $200,000 she reportedly earned for dishing on her affair with Ashton Kutcher,  Sarah Leal is regretting the decision to go public. “I got fired from my job. I am no longer friends with my best friend, who was my roommate, because it caused so many problems and I had to move out,” Leal tells Fox411. “I had no idea what I was getting myself into.” But she advises observers to think twice before rushing to judgment on her actions. “I wasn’t thinking clearly. He was a good-looking guy and it was stupid,” she says of the fling. “Most 22-year-old girls in my position would have done the same thing.”

Follow her on Twitter @DorothyatMetro.