It was a slow weekend for celebrities behaving badly, but luckily for gossip columnists everywhere, Brooke Mueller still can’t get her act together. That lady parties more than most Hollywood celebs combined.

The latest indiscretions of Charlie Sheen’s ex? After a wild Friday night, she was arrested in Aspen on assault and drug charges, according to People magazine. (Why always Aspen? Doesn’t she ever just go skiing out there?) The mother of two and frequent rehab resident was picked up at the nightclub Escobar after another female patron complained to police about an altercation. “Mueller was arrested and charged with assault in the third degree and possession of cocaine with intent to distribute,” an Aspen police official says. “Mueller posted bond of $11,000 and was released with a district court date of Dec. 19, 2011.”  This was Mueller’s second arrest for cocaine possession. In July, she had just finished a 30-day rehab session.

Although this seems like not-so-huge news, be prepared for a Sheen media onslaught this week, as Mueller has custody of their children. And just when you thought you’d get through the year without hearing from him again.

Cooper doesn’t respect the ‘Sexiest’ title

Bradley Cooper doesn’t necessarily enjoy being the Sexiest Man Alive, a title bestowed upon him by People magazine. “It’s been a weird couple of weeks. I did originally laugh and then I just started crying,” Cooper tells British website OMG. “I guess it’s a bit of a joke. I hope that it won’t change things,” he adds.

In fact, while other actors might see the title as an achievement, Cooper is worried it might become something of an impediment to his acting. “I’m glad it doesn’t detract from my work. I hope it doesn’t,” he says. “It would be unfortunate if it did because I’m not really that guy at all.”

Totally understandable, Bradley Cooper, you serious actor, you. Let’s all hope being called out as “sexy” doesn’t keep you from getting that Oscar nomination for your heart-wrenching portrayal in “The Hangover: Part 2.”

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